How to set goals that actually serve you

The end/beginning of the year is a kind of mythical time period. These calendar milestones help us mentally prepare for a new phase in our lives – even though we all know deep down that nothing really changes at midnight on December 31st.

According to a small survey I conducted in a private Facebook group, 96% of respondents didn't make any New Year's resolutions. That's pretty good, but I didn't stop there.

I also asked if any of you have ever set a goal for yourself that you later realized didn't serve your interests when you achieved it.

Many people answered yes, and they're the lucky ones, because even though they've worked for years to achieve a goal that doesn't give them anything, they're aware of it – or they realized it at some point.

It's much worse when you think you're working hard every day to achieve your own goals and making big sacrifices, but you don't realize that the company you work for has infiltrated your psyche and convinced you and your colleagues that the company's interests are the same as yours.

This is often achieved through various rewards (promotion, bonus, status, bigger company car, stock options, etc.). Frédéric Lordon, a French economist and philosopher, discusses this in detail in his 2010 book Willing Slaves of Capital: Spinoza and Marx on Desire, where he explains how bizarre it is when masses of people voluntarily and happily allow their employers to dominate their inner world.

This doesn't mean that entrepreneurs aren't in danger. Is it an authentic goal to increase my revenue by X% this year? Does it really serve me? Does it really satisfy my inner desires?

We often internalize external pressures so much that we don't even realize how much they weigh us down and limit our performance, and we're afraid to dream on our own.

To recognize this, we need a high degree of self-awareness, which takes time (and a lot of work and honesty). It's completely okay if we believe in our 20s that meeting external expectations will be good for us. In my experience, around the age of 35 – when we've done everything we've been asked to do, we have money and status – we realize that we won't be happy with what we've achieved so far.

To conclude this train of thought, I recommend the free workbook I created if you want to set new plans and goals for yourself in the spirit of questioning everything that neoliberal capitalism imposes on us to turn us into obedient, anxious consumers and workers.

Instead, we should consider our own needs, desires, qualities, and ways of functioning in the equation of our lives!